I'm a young care giver for my 54 year old mother who suffered a ruptured brain aneurysm 11 years ago.
Up until April of 2019, my father cared for her. He passed away and since then I have moved my mother into my house.
My mom had recovered fairly well given the circumstances, grade 5 rupture. She is verbal, can walk, comprehend things etc. Her social skills and motor skills are a little off because her aneurysm happened in the pre-frontal cortex. She has not worked or driven since the aneurysm, but when she was living with my dad she was cooking, doing laundry etc. I did not live with them. I thought she was doing fine since my dad never said anything.
Since she moved in with me I've noticed that she can not do the things my father was allowing her to do. .like cooking properly, washing clothes, etc. She seems to understand what I'm saying but does not learn when I try to correct . . . it's been 2 months of trying to retrain her just to do very basic things. The first day here, she flooded my basement during a shower. I noticed she was not cooking things thoroughly, not washing her hands, not storing food properly (she is no longer cooking ) . . putting completely dirty dishes away, sometimes soaking wet. it has all been very surprising and a little embarrassing as well because I have roommates. I figured she is just adjusting to new routine, + going through grief from losing her husband in 2019 ( she cries everyday ) & maybe it has added to her confusion.
But now, she is exhibiting concerning behavior that I know has associations with early dimentia - rummaging through my things when I'm not home, getting days and nights confused, and this morning I stepped in a pile of human feces in the middle of the bathroom floor?! it's heartbreaking to type this. Her mother had dimentia for 10+ years, so I am very very concerned this is the early onset of it. I DO have a scheduled doctors appointment. But wanted to get some of my own insight from as many sources as I can. If you have a personal experience you could share or compare with regarding TBI or early dimentia, please do. I want to be prepared as I know it can progress fast and things can happen.
Your mom is old day by day and she loses her husband recently that's why she might be confused or feel someone (Your father) and this is really cannot expose peoples and it's as like mental illness but not it's the cause of your father because she still misses him a lot. cause of the age she is doing this kind of thing.
My suggestion is if possible HIRE a Caregiver she can handle her properly because she cannot express everything to you.Maybe she can do this to the caregiver You can follow the Caregiving terms and you may learn more things from here.
Your mother needs all the care and assistance as she is already exhibiting advanced symptoms. I for one suggest close monitoring and assistance especially when she does the household stuff. Don't make her idle even if she makes all these problems, just allow her to do those things but if possible, be there while she is doing it. The depression she feels must be heartbreaking.
Arlene
Hello, Sara. How is everything going right now? I think you should get professional help to take care of your mom. That's the best option you have to truly help her.
DaveI wish you all the best.