Good morning Everyone. I am at a loss on what my next step is.... I have an aging controlling mother with manageable health issues, a father with early stage Alzheimers and a brother - my only sibling who is mentally ill and lives in a structured environment. As of yesterday my mother is upset with me because she feels I need to step up to the plate more. We all live in the same area within 15 mins away from each other. I am currently working part time and unemployed. My goal is to establish full time employment, and eventually own my own business so at this time I attempt to help with my family as much as I can. We have had the conversation about the next steps about downsizing to living in a retirement community even though my parents are financially stable. I prefer to be proactive but my suggestions fall on deaf ears. My mother is stressed out and wants a break. I emailed vacation getaways and suggested hiring a care giver to come in now but my mother prefers to wait until my Dad's illness progresses. My mother now wants me to assist my brother with his finances which I refused and advised to have his counselors intervene. My mother has a strained relationship with all her siblings which all live close by and she has minimal friends and she expects me to take care of everyone. Any suggestions? Thank you
I heard a lot of people in the same difficult situation as you right now. Talking to it calmly with your mom might help. In times like this, you need to explain to her your current state or your opinions regarding the matter and that you do have other problems to deal with.
Thank you natnatroswell22! I will try that :)
You are always welcome Dee! Any updates would also be appreciated.
Good Morning Everyone,
It was a tough weekend. My mom decided not to follow through with getting a project life saver bracelet for my Dad who has Als. She stated he was still pretty alert. But then my Mom cancelled her Labor Day reservations because my Dad was upset and crying that she was leaving. She explained that it was just an overnight retreat. My mom was so emotional and crying when I explained, it's his illness and that he would not normally act like that. She then yelled at me. Then she went on to say how he's not going to remember any of us eventually. I explained to my Mom that unless she wants that to happen it will. Focus on the here and now. Idk.. but being stressed out about what might happen doesn't help matters. My mom must go away and relax - she desperately needs it. Any advice on what to tell someone with dementia - when the caregiver needs a break and goes on vacation. Thanks in advance. DEE123