My name is Jeff and i lived with my father for a few months prior to his diagnosis because I struggle with schizo affective disorder. The plan was to move out when I got on my feet. Dad started acting strangley, i talked him into seeing a doctor and having the recommended scat scan which led to an MRI which revealed an aggressive tumor the doctors feel will be fatal no matter what treatment is used. Dad opted for hospice. This was just under 3 months ago. He has declined very quickly, so I cook, clean, dress him, bought him a lift chair, help him to the bathroom and clean him up if he has an "accident." I find it very hard to sleep because I never know when he will need help. My family can't fill in very often and when they do, they opt for caregiving techniques that can be performed by two or more people, but are not sustainable when it is just me by myself. He is resistant to use walkers, showerbenches, Depends, raised toliet seats ect and my family tends to let him off the hook and do things for him that take more than one person to occomplish. This has made me very villagent when I'm alone because i have to be alert when he needs help and i find it hard to sleep. Symptoms if schizo affective disorder have sometimes returned ( hypo mania, auditory Hullucinations) and i must work past them to get my caregiving work done. I need sleep and i feel the best help my family could offer is 1 help me find sustainable day to day solutions to provlems that occue when they're not here. 2 If they are going to take over when they visit, then do so and let me rest!
HI there- so sorry you are ging thru this= its so hard!
Time for a family meeting- you need to assert what YOU need and tell the family they NED to step up- YOU cannot be a good caregiver unless YOU are at 100% (or close to it) . They need to find a way to give you a break. YOU are doing enough.
Does Dad qualify for day care at all? Home aid care? Look into elder services maybe?