Not even sure where to begin. This has been such a dramatic change for us both.
I’m 55 – Hes 48. We’ve been together 7 years in a committed relationship.
Nick suffered a TBI (sub arachnoid hematoma) in July 2019 stemming from a motorcycle accident – 4 months later, while STILL in the hospital, he suffered a stroke.
He is very high functioning (most wouldn’t even realize he had a TBI or stroke) but he’s just so angry!
I really think he hasn’t come to terms on his new brain. Frustrating to say the least.
He isn’t working or driving yet- something he just can’t fathom WHY he isn’t (hence the docs telling him he isn’t ready lol) Our PCP believes he will both drive, work AND ride again so that’s a good sign.
He hates ‘jumping thru the hoops’- Umm its ONLY Been 6 months and 4 of them you were hospitalized dude. And he remembers bout 10% of that hospitalization too – so h really doesn’t ‘get’ how far he has come.
When he gets upset, he is like the HULK- drop of a hat- unknown reason and BOOM! Another hole in the wall or smashed glass. He doesn’t come at me so that’s a great thing! But darn- its hella violent and scary.
Ten minutes later he doesn’t even know why it happened and feels badly.
Hes been inpatient psych since the accident for a week (where they determined this wasn’t his Bipolar rearing its ugly head- it was ‘just’ his brain going thru healing ) and is on meds to keep his Mental illness at bay (its always been very well managed)
IM overwhelmed. His mom and he don’t have the best relationship and I’ve left with the brunt of everything. She so out there- she badgers him about things that don’t matter now and actually told him the other day he needed to ‘get over’ his anger and being upset about everything… SMH shes useless.
I work FT outside the home and still take him to all his appts OT, docs, Psych while trying to work my 40+ hour workweek because we need the money to survive.
I’m dealing with disability insurance getting the right psych care for him (seems like NO office wants to help him) and just EVERYTHING.
I hope others can just help me feel positive and keep me afloat- I feel like I’m drowning.
I was a caregiver for my aphasic stroke patient mom for 15 years and for my dad in his final two years with myelodysplasia so Im not new to caregiving – but even then I had help in managing .
