Greetings! New | Caregiver Action Network

Greetings! New

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Greetings! New

Hello Everyone! My name is Pam and I live in South carolina. I have been the family caregiver for many many years and I am really getting to the point where I just don't know how much more I can do. I am suffering from depression among other things. I cared for my dad when he was diagnosed with stomach and esophageal cancer in 2010 and passed away that same year. I cared for my mom after that and also two nephews that my mom and dad adopted ( their grandchildren). My mother had many disorders such as, degenerative disc disease, COPD, severe arthritis, thyroid issues, migraines, and the list goes on. It got to where she barely got out of bed everyday. She passed away unexpectedly in Sept. 2015. Since then I have gained full legal custody of the two nephews which are 11 and 17 right now. The following March after my mothers death, my husband was put out of work because of back issues and we were hoping they could figure out something and return to work but since then he has had cervical fusion, and now needs to have thoracic back surgery because he has a herniated disk that is pressing on his spinal cord. I have to undress, bathe, dry, dress and comb his hair for him because of his back and because he has two frozen should joints from lack of use. He can't bend over to pick up things or reach above his shoulders. Just about 3 weeks ago he had a stroke and they could not figure out where the clot originated from that went to his brain. About 3 months after my husband was put out of work, my 11 year old nephew was diagnosed with a rare genetic defect in his immune system. It is called Primary Immunodefiecency Disease and I now have to do in home infusion once a week with him. His immune system is almost nil without those infusions and he gets sick alot. During all this going on I have since lost an uncle who was like a father to me, a sister in law, a mentally and physically handicapped brother who was in the hospital, lost my sister in law who I was close to, I am 52 years old and I suffer from severe Osteoperosis, vitamin defiecencies, Osteoarthritis and degenerative disc disease. I am at my wits end now. I have been struggling financially, emotionally, and all other ways. I have been through grief counseling since my moms death, she was my everything and who kept me grounded. I am struggling financially trying to make ends meet since we have went from a 70,000 a year income to about 16,000. A couple of times we have just about lost everything, but with God's grace and love I have managed to juggle things to keep us going. I really need someone to talk to that is not associated with family. I too am disabled and cannot work. Even if I could I couldn't do it because there is noone else to take care of my family. I liked one class finishing my Bachelors Degree in Psychology and can't take it right now. I just really need someone to talk to and vent cause right now I just do not want to go on anymore and if you knew me and the kind of person I am You would know that that is saying A LOT........... Thank you for any feedback you can give me. 


IHaveNoRights's picture
Wow Pam you are in a very

Wow Pam you are in a very rough spot! I'm sorry that I, a newbie to this forum am the first one to respond to you. I just joined today. Have your financial struggles continued or have you found some relief?

Jean A
Pam, you are in my prayers, I

Pam, you are in my prayers, I thought I was having a hard time dealing with my husband's illness, but reading what you are going through. I realize I have it easy.  

I am also new to this sight

I am also new to this sight although my circumstances are no where near as bad as yours I understand the need to scream and cry (even if you have to do it in secret.) You are definitely not alone, feel free to vent I know I'm going to-a lot. I'll include you in my prayers I think a lot of people are.

If you can't find a place to

If you can't find a place to relieve stress, try getting over it, it makes you forget the things you're stressed about and find new joy.